


"Maybe if Shrimpy was on our team you'd be more motivated"

by pandibicth



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Character Study, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Kenma's big fat crush on shouyou is the blood that runs through my veins, M/M, Self-Indulgent, bear with the metaphors i was listening to glass animals, he's feral and rude accept it, kenma: looks at shouyou, maybe i like the smell of tangerines too much, me: omg maybe romance isnt dead after all, rated g for gay, the only romance that matters, there's some weird poetry shit, this is just me complaining about how ppl write kenma, vent fic, word vomit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-12-30 18:19:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18320699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandibicth/pseuds/pandibicth
Summary: Kenma thinks about love and Shouyou, in no particular orderThe title is stupid but the fanfic is cute





	"Maybe if Shrimpy was on our team you'd be more motivated"

**Author's Note:**

> the story behind this is that i was ranting on twitter (follow me) abt how people always write kenma as calm and nice and it pisses me off so i wanted to write something about it but it didn't turn out that way ????  
> also im sick & kind of feverish + its 2:30 am as we speak so this might be really bad  
> enjouy

Sometimes, Kenma thinks, it’s just easier to believe that people are two-dimensional. People have a tendency to just put other persons in boxes, because it’s just simpler. And he doesn’t mean that in a sort of condescending way, it’s not like he doesn’t do it himself, he’s really just observing facts. Kenma is often thought of as a quiet person, who doesn’t care much about anything. He knows that, and he guesses that it’s just easy to think of him that way, because he looks the part.

The truth is that Kenma doesn’t half-ass things he likes. He looks like isn’t motivated by anything, but it’s mostly because he likes few things and it’s kind of hard to see his excitement on his face. Kuroo can do it, Tora too, and that’s about it. He likes to think that Shouyou is able to read him too, but being delusional is not attractive, his mother had always told him.

It’s funny how people like to describe love as bittersweet. It’s probably because it’s a nice word, and after you use it you can write a lot of pretty metaphors, about how it’s like being stung by a beautiful rose, touching a soft material you can’t buy, wanting the pain because it feels good anyway. Kenma thinks that being in love is more like staring directly into the sun, but maybe it’s just because Shouyou has a bright smile. Love burns hard into his heart, and warms his fingers: sometimes Shouyou laughs and the world stops to listen; clouds drip maple syrup and his eyes shine like a cherry lollipop. Kenma thinks that bittersweet really isn’t the right way to describe that feeling, it just feels so weak and boring. Describing it as a burning fire probably isn’t breaking some new grounds, but it does more justice to his heart beating in sync with the loud bangs of fireworks. 

More often than he’d like to admit, Kenma thinks about stupid things that don’t matter, like how Shouyou’s hair curls up after a long practice, or how his cheeks are covered by a million freckles in summer, how when you get really close to him, he smells like tangerines, or how his lips seem damaged by the cold and he can’t be bothered to put chapstick on, how sometimes he would grab Kenma’s hand and it feels like he’s falling from a cliff into the ocean. He floats, white bubbles filling his vision, his skin finally allowed to heal from the heat of the sun.

Sometimes he hits Kuroo when he starts his little taunts about “Chibi-chan” and how the fact that Kenma is enamored by the way he moves around is way too obvious, and Kuroo will wonder out loud how people can think that Kenma is a collected person. That kind of conversation usually ends with Kenma telling him that he’ll never find a partner with that kind of attitude and Kuroo shooting back that he should wash his hair more often.

When he’s left alone in his bed at night, when he has finished a game he really liked, and he feels maybe a bit sad, Kenma thinks about Shouyou, and how he must be sleeping right now, kicking his blankets around, probably snoring, because he seems like the type of person who snores, loud and impossible to ignore even when he’s asleep. He likes to wonder about how it would feel to lay next to him, to press against him, relishing in the insane heat he exudes, to feel his hair tickle his chin and to smell his soap in the crook of his neck, and he feels maybe a little bit less sad.

Kenma thinks a lot about Shouyou, really, but maybe Kenma just thinks too much.

**Author's Note:**

> LARIGHT I HOPE YOU LIKED IT IF YES CONSIDER LEAVING A KUDO OR A COMMENT  
> genuinely comments make me so happy i think about them all day  
> anyway follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/pandibicth) if yall want i talk abt kenhina !!!!  
> i also made [youtube video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Hltk9cS5QI) its cool and it took me a long time so


End file.
